Hey Sugar stars,

Today I just got an urge to talk about a few  things. I’m going to keep it short , but please remember these are just my opinions.

The pressure 

I’m in my early 20’s and I’m not married *screams*. Life in an African household consist of parents assuming that you should get married immediately after you graduate. A ready made man will be patiently waiting at your doorstep willingly ready to make you his wife. In reality it doesn’t always work that way. I believe marriage is a long life commitment and you shouldn’t get married because of social pressures at home , on social media etc. To be honest marriage is not something i saw myself getting into in the past  because I didn’t think I was the type of person to fall in love . Fortunately, I fell in love and then my perception changed ,I can actually see myself getting married someday. Marriage is between two people blessed with the union of God. I will get married someday but i won’t rush into it because of social pressures.

It’s not your job to shape him

You don’t have to be in a relationship with someone even if you love them , it’s okay to be his friend whilst he’s working on himself and you’re working on yourself. Sometimes when you’re in love you try everything in your power to make sure your boyfriend reaches his full potential that you forget to work on yourself. If that’s the case then you should not be in a relationship. In fact you’re not ready for a relationship. I believe that God has a man out there for me , it shouldn’t be my job to shape him because that’s God’s job not mine. Sometimes as women you give a guy all the benefits , so he settles and does not push himself to become the best . You shouldn’t treat your boyfriend like he’s your husband . In my case I put in so much energy into a relationship that i lost my focus , changed my goals in order to meet another person’s goals. Once again remember men are not your clay where you can mold them into what you want , the clay belongs to God. He has made a man for you.

Relationship goals 

Hashtag #relationshipgoals .

This has been a reoccurring tag on social media. Too many people are  spending too much time idolising other people’s relationship instead of focusing on their own . It’s fine to be inspired but claiming other people’s goals based on what is presented to you  on social media is not always a good idea. The tongue is very powerful and what you claim can actually come to pass. I don’t idolise people’s relationship as I believe God has created an unique path for everyone’s relationship . You don’t know what another couple has been going  through and you don’t know what they are going through. Sometimes people have good , healthy relationships but because they spend soo much time trying to idolise other people’s goals based on an image on social media , they start to intoxicate their own relationship.

In summary forget about what everyone is talking about and focus on your own goals . Focus on your own purpose in life.


I will rise , you will rise . We are all superstars.





  1. Well done Insight your star (I m sorry I dont knw your name). I love this post. 🙂 I m also in my early twenties and finishd my graduation. I m in my first year of post graduation. 😀 so I guess we are of almost the same age 🙂 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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